she liked Imaginary Men best of all

Things I wouldn’t have to do if I lived at Downton Abbey

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Like pretty much everyone in the free world, I’m obsessed with Downton Abbey. I watched last season and kept it on my DVR until Christmas, when I got the DVD and now my mom and I feverishly await each Sunday night like scone addicts in need of a fix.

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My mom loves all the downstairs stuff – in a previous life she was a maid of some sort cleaning or cooking. I am fixated on the upstairs – the life of leisure and beautiful dresses. We figure that in a previous life I was a Lady of the Manor and she was my Ladies Maid and we were reunited in this life as mother and daughter!

Of course we HATE O’Brien! Who DOESN’T??

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I spend an inordinate amount of time thinking up all the tedious things I would not have to do if Downton Abbey were a real place and I lived there as a real Lady.

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Instead of doing all THIS stuff, I could focus on the very full schedule of taking strolls, tending to my correspondence, going to parties and having tea!

Things I Wouldn’t Have to do if I Lived at Downton Abbey

  • Make a grocery list
  • Buy groceries
  • Put groceries away
  • (basically anything involving groceries)
  • Make breakfast
  • Make lunch
  • Make dinner
  • (basically anything involving cooking)
  • Wash dishes
  • Sort laundry
  • Do laundry
  • Fold and put away laundry
  • Clean the house
  • (particularly vacuuming, if they had vacuums at Downton)
  • Make my bed
  • Pick out my clothes
  • Select my accessories
  • Dress myself
  • Undress myself
  • Brush my hair
  • Do my hair
  • Shine my shoes
  • Drive to my job
  • Have a job
  • Warm my boots on a space heater before leaving my job
  • (basically any sort of job or labor of any sort)

I mean, I’m exhausted just reading that list and I have to do that crap ALL the time!! I would much rather get involved with village gossip and give in to the demanding rigors of having to stand there while my maid put on my dress and did my hair and fastened my jewelry!

But there is still some way that I can be a Downton Abbey Lady – and that’s by closely studying Dowager Countess Violet Crawley, played by such superb perfection by Dame Maggie Smith that I am thisclose to putting her on my Stalking List with all the rock stars and vampire boys 😉

I. LOVE. Her.

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When I am an old lady I will wear enormous dramatic hats, purse my lips disapprovingly and say clever things so politely, that it will take people a moment to realize they’ve been insulted.

THIS is the life!!

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If for some insane reason you are not watching Downton Abbey (and I can’t imagine what that reason would be, unless you Hate Things That Are Amazing or you are Thomas the Evil Footman), you can catch up here, you can buy Season 1, watch Season 2 on PBS and you can see what to expect from me when I am Dowager Countess Amy by watching this:

(and visit the Tom and Lorenzo blog where I snagged most of these fabulous pics!)

Author: Amy H. Johnson

Amy H. Johnson is the author of The Fangirl Files a memoir about Boy Bands, TV Boyfriends and imaginary betrothals to 80s English pop stars. She prefers to be referred to as a "Cute Famous Boy Aficionado".

4 thoughts on “Things I wouldn’t have to do if I lived at Downton Abbey

  1. I will join this discussion as soon as I am done catching up!

  2. This post was hilarious. I’ve recently become hooked on Downton Abbey too. And you are right, Violet MAKES this show (along with Matthew and Mary, of course . . . yes, I’m a shipper.) Not to spoil for those who aren’t up to “date,” but I loved Violet’s covering up her rare show of emotion with, “I have a cold,” this week. I’ll admit to using that one myself a few times, during inopportune crying jags. (Though, I tend to say “allergies” . . . I find people are more inclined to believe it, that way. ;))

    As for the other couples, I must say, I’m not a big fan of Branson and Sybil. (He’s self-righteous / treats her like dirt, and she just takes it, because she feels guilty about being “high born.”) And while I do like Anna and Bates, their dialogue has become a bit eye roll worthy, of late.

    Oh, and you’ve seen these, right?

  3. It is heavenly to imagine life at Downton Abbey. The clothes are so feminine and beautiful,as are the gardens, the trees, the porcelain,the flowers ,the many hats. You forgot having a ladys maid to bathe you as well-and bring tea in bed in the morning!!! maybe in our next lives -best wishes Lady Amy-

  4. I completely agree with everything you wrote in this post!

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